A Human Feels: "I know it’s my fault that I have no friends, but I don’t have any energy left anymore. Everything takes too much energy, and the people I talk to don’t actually care about me anyway."

Anmol Responds: I hear you and yes, you’re right. Everything takes energy, and you would notice that it takes more energy when we are resisting.. when we do not believe in what we are doing because that’s when we are not in sync with our thoughts, feelings, and actions.

Talking to people may need less energy than it needs to avoid people. Try to remember a time when you were caught up in overthinking about a conversation, but when it happened, it was just like a moment that passed so easily that it left you surprised and you questioned, ‘That happened so simply?’

Now that we know about the energy, I feel the thought that ‘they don’t actually care’ is what bothers us and is what makes us feel that we do not have the energy to invest in the people who don’t care about us, who do not reciprocate, and that makes sense. It’s all right not to invest energy in those who do not reciprocate, but the question would be how we know whether the next person will reciprocate the energy or not?

We will look for its answer, however, let’s talk a bit more about energy. Yes, we all must be cautious about investing our energy in people because we are not just investing our physical energy but our emotional energy as well. And energy is precious.

Our mind would always like to save energy as it is responsible for our survival. That being said, now when we look at our conversation with people, we can feel that we don’t have enough energy, especially when we think/feel unsure about the outcome of the energy that we are going to invest in the next person. We look for the outcome and somewhere ask ourselves, will our investment be worthwhile? Will the next person respect our energy and reciprocate?

Confusion is an energy vampire; it sucks your energy, and you would feel you don’t have the energy to invest.

Knowing the value of the energy, if we feel it won’t be reciprocated, then yes, our mind will turn on the energy reserve mode, which will make us feel we don’t have much energy to gamble. That’s our mind, doing its job to help us survive.

But the question is yet unanswered! How would we know if the next person will reciprocate the energy or not?

To answer this, let’s ask one more question: how could we ever know? Interesting question right?

Well, the key is to be conscious of how much time and energy you are investing and keeping track of it. Our mind sees investing energy as a gamble because honestly, that is what it is, humans are humans, no ifs and buts.

However, the fact is you would need to invest your energy in people whether you like it or not, till you are on Earth. If going to Mars, do let me know.

As we discussed earlier, whenever we resist, unsure or uncertain about it, that takes more energy! So instead of it, what can we do?

If you are allowed to play gamble, with your hard earned money would you invest all your money on just one thing, especially when you’re unsure of its outcomes?

No, right, you won’t invest all of your money! 

Similarly, we shall invest our energy in small chunks. As we discussed, we should be aware and should keep a count on our energy invested.

This is how it is going to help you; start investing your energy in chunks that you can track so you know where your energy was reciprocated and where it was not. And then you would know what to do, right?

Invest more chunks of energy where it is reciprocated, and reduce the chunk of energy where it is not reciprocated. As you practice this, it will help you to make conversations, make connections, and that will lead to meaningful friendships 😊.

I wish you all the very best for the upcoming adventures where you invest your energy wisely, and let’s witness how it turns out for you 😊.

Do share it with a friend you think they should learn about this so that they can invest their time and energy in people who care for them.

This was today’s “A Human Feels”; see you next week on Friday with another one for more insightful discussions and valuable tips on emotional well-being.

With empathy and understanding,

Ambidextrous Anmol,

Psychology Professional Propelled by Passion, Positivity, and Purpose.