I hear you, and I can understand the complex emotions you’re experiencing. It’s hard to acknowledge the praise you receive for being a good friend when you resent the moments you put others before yourself.

The guilt you’re experiencing is overwhelming because it feels like you’re living a double life. On the outside, you always help people and are there for them whenever they need you, no matter how small or big the need may be. But on the inside, you beat yourself up for being unable to work on your own things, leading to the overtime, less sleep, and compromised leisure time. Whenever you take a moment of relief, someone asks for help, and the cycle repeats.

This cycle makes you regret those moments when you helped others over yourself. Your feelings are valid. You were there for your friends, and their appreciation is genuine, but you can’t appreciate it because it costs your well-being.

When you mentioned that you “hated those times,” I understand how you felt, and I empathize with the feelings stemming from neglecting your own needs and well-being.

Consistently putting others before yourself can lead to feelings of resentment and burnout. It’s a common struggle, especially for those who are naturally giving and caring. However, prioritizing your needs is essential for maintaining healthy relationships and personal happiness.

Consider having this conversation with yourself:

“I am sorry for not listening to my needs. I often ignored my feelings to help others, fearing that saying no would make me a bad friend. But now, I realize that neglecting my own well-being has left me feeling drained and resentful.

Dear myself, can you forgive me for not putting you first?”

Acknowledge your past actions and commit to being there for yourself just like you do for others. It’s okay to set boundaries and prioritize your well-being. It might sound selfish, but believe me, you will be able to help your friends better when you are good with yourself. When your needs are met, you will appreciate how your contributions help others.

I wish you all the best in being there for yourself. Consider yourself your own best friend and forgive yourself, starting a new journey where prioritizing your well-being enables you to support others more effectively.

With empathy & understanding,

Ambidextrous Anmol, Psychology Professional Propelled by Passion, Positivity, & Purpose.

P.S. It's for informational purposes, aiming to raise emotional awareness and encourage healthy expression. Created by ExpressUneasiness.com, dedicated to promoting emotional well-being.